The truth is rarely pure and never simple

Once again it has been two months since i last updated this blog.

A lot of the time whilst I walk around Pearl Lagoon or while I'm sitting there doing yet another excavation in the Pearl Cays, I am simultaneously writing this blog.

It just never gets typed out.

I went home last month and it was not what i expected. I mean...frankly after being here in Nicaragua for six months I'm pretty sure i romanticized how great Florida and seeing everyone would be.

Don't get me wrong, seeing my family and friends, eating hummus, and super fast internet was great.
Its just things change don't they? And sometimes it feels like while you were living in another country, time has been standing still and everyone has moved on to bigger and better things...or grown up.

I don't know.

Mind you readers, I have grown plenty. I have dealt with many things I didn't realize I could push through. I have surprised myself. I have been disappointed in myself. Its just, i feel pretty isolated here and at a stand still. Especially in a place that can be so...backwards.

My life has completely changed, What I thought was real is a lie, what I believed in and loved has taken on a form I no longer recognize.

And damn its hard to get past it. Its hard not to just shut down and not speak to anyone.
I may seem ok, but I am not...but who ever really is?

We all have our issues.

Besides all this vagueness I'm putting out...

I had a great time in Canada visiting the six amazing girls I met here in Pearl Lagoon, AND I WAS SO COLD. haha!

I also am planning a mind blowing trip to Thailand (possibly also Cambodia...andddd Canada again, ay?) starting this April. I am so scared and excited, but glad I'll be going on this adventure with Jay and Shivani!

The turtles are...well here.

I got really upset the other day. Mind, I am never happy when i see turtle meat being shared out....but this is the first time I have seen this large amount. I had just finished "making exercise" with my friend Sara. I was walking up pointe to visit my lovely friend Laura. I was in a damn good mood for once. And then i start seeing people walk by with flippers and carapaces and bags full of meat. And DAMN IT, i couldnt help but start crying...its just fucking gets to me sometimes....these poor animals are so endangered and cant catch a damn break in this town, in the whole Pearl lagoon basin. No matter how I explain that we need to protect them: lecturing, cajoling, arguing, threatening, WHATEVER...they Don't Care.
At all.
And its just hard to see what you've worked so hard to protect be slaughtered in front of your eyes.
Then later that day I saw at least 20 greens laid out in the cays to be brought in for slaughter....

Green on Columbilla Cay
Notice the practice of drilling holes in the flippers
and tying them together....

It is upsetting to say the least, cultural practices aside...killing green turtles outside of the ban is ILLEGAL. And that...that is what kills me the most. If they are killing so many outside of season, how many do they kill during?

But this is why we keep fighting on right? If WCS was not a presence here the killing would be much worse, it wouldnt just be greens getting slaughtered, by now the hawksbill population might have well been extinct. And that my friends is what keeps me going...this project went from 150 nests to over 300 less than 15 years later.

BOOYAH!

I am sorry for this next section but I just saw this happen a little over an hour ago and it is what prompted me to write again, sometimes you need to let things out.
I have seen a number of unsettling things here...too many. Today I saw a small puppy get run over by a motorcycle...I am very surprised I did not throw up....it is one of the saddest things I have ever seen. I feel so sorry for the poor little girl whose puppy it was....

And if I havent depressed you enough with this post and you are still here with me...

here are some happy pictures of a cool sea slug I found yesterday! It really is the little things that keep you going, and these guys made me giggle!

Mr. Slug!

awww Mr. Slug

Where Joe lives in Rocky Point

Nick and Seeta making some French toast on the farm!

Our platters of French toast goodness. Coco bread, honey, cinnamon!

The walk from Rocky Point to Pearl Lagoon

Silly Urchin!

Until Next time :D

Melissa

I thought i had updated this blog in October.

Apparently I was lying to myself.

Last I updated was two months ago in September. I hadn't forgotten, not truly, its just every time i thought about it....I felt too lazy to start.

Much has happened since then.

I started spending more time in the cays with my teams. I feel happier there, and its just so gorgeous I felt the lack of electricity, a proper toilet and such didn't even matter. I had a blast! Work hard, play hard, and nap a lot. That was my mantra.

I spent a lot of time with my Canadian friends. These six girls made my transition into life here in Lagoon so much more bearable. I will miss you all so much when you leave in two weeks!!! :(((

My dad visited at the end of October. I went to pick him up in bluefields and then dropped him off when he left, 5 short days later. I cried both times. I miss my family tons.

My friend Jen came and visited me and helped me with work in the beginning of November...Thanks so much Jen, having you here was a blast!!!! So many more crazy stories to add to our Central American adventures together!

I miss home a lot still. I have less than a month before I fly back into Miami. I'm most excited to see my mom. She left a week before i did to Colombia and so it will be more than 6 months since we last saw each other. The longest I've ever been away from her! I will also hug the crap out of my little brother, no matter how much he protests haha. Sadly my dog Fluffy will not be there to greet me as he always has the past 14 years of my life. He died October 10th. There will be a definite hole in our family when I arrive.

I've learned a lot about myself these past 5 months here in Nicaragua.

- I am still a very angry person (mostly when it comes to sea turtle conservation here). All sellers of hawksbill products beware when i have a couple of tonas in me

-my skin still hates the humidity.

-i walk faster than anyone here. I book it everywhere.

-i like my freedom here. so much so, i consider renewing my contract just to keep it.

-i still really hate cockroaches

Really though, i HATE THEM.

..................
My macbook trackpad stopped working in the beginning of October so I am missing some pictures but I have plenty to share besides that. Also, they are very out of order....

Enjoy!